Do you mind if I speak frankly today? I had to start a new medication a few days ago because my symptoms have been steadily progressing. Apparently it’s much stronger than the med I previously took. It makes me feel so fatigued and unmotivated. Ugh. I don’t like feeling unmotivated. It goes against the grain of who I am or at least who I want to be.
My husband, David, insists I rest, but I’m afraid to. I realize that sounds silly, but let me explain. I worry I will feel like this most days now, so to rest instead of getting stuff done, makes me worry I will never get things done going forward. I get it in my head that when I feel like this, it means that I will always feel like this. I don’t stop to consider it’s just an off day. I know. I know. That’s a bit much. After stating this, I realize I put a lot of pressure on myself.
It’s not like I’m a doctor or have some hoity-toity job that requires my great skill and expertise. I’m just a regular person with stuff to do around the house and on-line school work to get done. I simply don’t want to get behind on either. I want to be a productive person. Life is different for me now. I admit I get scared sometimes. I worry I will eventually be “un-able.” Goodness gracious! I guess I can be a bit of a drama queen.
As I sit here clicking away on my keyboard to express my thoughts, the Holy Spirit has reminded me of something: “Take off your ‘crown’, Shawna. This is only temporary.” My health situation is only temporary! I will not have neurological issues forever. You’ll have to excuse me for my gloominess. Sometimes I become hostess, honored guest and VIP of my little pity parties. Then the Holy Spirit has to reign me back in. Regardless of what I may go through, I won’t have PD on the other side of eternity. I think I mentioned this in a previous post, but I forget sometimes. Silly me.
Colossians 3:2 says, “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” Imagine living every single day of life with the mind-set of eternity with Jesus Christ! It makes this short life here seem so much less tragic. For those of us who accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we can rest assured that any of the hopelessness we may feel in this world is simply a short, annoying blip compared to the overwhelming amazingness of heaven for eternity!
So if you’re struggling with something, and you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, change your mind to that of an eternal one. Life isn’t easy sometimes, but it won’t be like this forever. Remember what 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 says, “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”
Phew!
Pray with me: Father, thank You for always being there for me. I get worked up about stuff sometimes. I really don’t need to because You’ve done the ultimate by providing a way for my sins to be forgiven and by defeating death and providing a way for me to spend eternity in heaven. There will be no pain or sadness there! In the meantime, help me to keep my eyes fixed on You. Whenever I get discouraged, change my mind to that of an eternal one. What a relief that I can have the hope of eternal life with you and other believers. I love You.
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