29.01.2020 – Exhaustion

83101557_2558694967562664_156257863780532224_nExhaustion. Something that definitely goes hand in hand with this job. It’s a different kind of exhaustion that I’ve ever experienced before. My body hit the pillow after a 12 hour non stop day and asked to never get back up again. My brain resembles play dough after a continuum of multi tasking, communicating, quick thinking and quick maths, with little to no break. But my heart is still beating, with more excitement than ever and is what will keep me alive in this industry until the end of time. It lives for the adrenaline as well as the feeling of utter exhaustion that follows.

I love the ache in my muscles, the stage of delirium in my head, the pins and needles in my feet, the stiff wrists and shoulders. I love the thought of getting up and doing it all over again, and not knowing what tomorrow will bring.

Fitting to the devastating recent news, my mum sent me a quite today by Kobe Bryant, after I had a little moan about how stressful and tiring my day has been:

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What I’ve taken from it is, It’s OK to have stressful days. It’s OK to doubt yourself. All the emotion is OK, the exhaustion is OK, because I know it’s the result of working as hard as I can, doing what I love and working towards my goal. Sorry it’s a short one, that’s the last of the thoughts my brain is willing to process today but I hope it was still inspiring. More to come tomorrow of course. Grace.

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